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ABC To Replace Whoopie on “The View” With Jane Fonda

Oh, the troublesome “View”.  ABC television’s multi-million dollar cash cow is losing it’s prime head of cattle, and replacing her with their newest moo monster.

Starting on February 29th, Whoopie Goldberg, the former face of the daytime gabfest will be officially leaving the show, citing the desire for more “time with her family” as well as her rebounding movie and television acting career.  The nappy headed noodnik has been cast in both the Star Trek show “Picard” as her character “Guinan”, as well as a new Disney Marvel program, “Miracleman” as “The Fire Drake.”

Replacing the blabbery bouillon will be none other than “Hanoi Jane” herself, Jane Fonda.  The network feels that such a substitute will cement the time slot for communism and socialism completely.

Joe Barron, ABC’s head of Wine and Cheese Displays commented on the switcheroo.

“Jane is the perfect replacement because she will really bring in the whole shebang, Marxism, liberalism, communism, hell, even smell-o-vision for all that the Trumptards know.  They’re super confused when it comes to that kind of stuff.”

“Hopefully, Miss Fonda will enjoy a warm reception on her first day, and maybe throw out a little CRT education.  It’s going to be great.  Alright, Ewige Blumekraft, fellow Illuminati.  Barron out.”

What do you think about Jane Fonda joining the cast?  Will you watch It?  Will it still be a hit?  Are you ready for the Moon Knight series that I’ve waited half my life for?  Excelsior, true believers!

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